Well I’ll back up a bit first. Before I proposed, Amanda and I had already been discussing marriage for a couple of months. She came to visit me in Connecticut a few weeks after I moved out here back in October, and we went ring shopping in the local malls and of course at Tiffany’s in NYC. From there, things started moving forward in both of our minds as we came to the realization that we would spend the rest of our lives together. We had both known that’s what we had wanted for awhile, but it wasn’t until then that we actually used the ‘M’ word, marriage.
After she left to go home, I started to think about marriage more often and realized that at the rate things were moving, I had to make some decisions about when I would talk with her parents and propose. Because Amanda and I live roughly 1,000 miles apart, I only get to see her once a month and we alternate visiting each other, so there were limited opportunities for me to make my move and even less for me to talk with her parents in person. Adding to this, I was getting excited and wanted to get things moving. I knew Amanda was the one I wanted and I knew she reciprocated the feeling, so I didn’t see any reason in prolonging things.
When Thanksgiving came around and I flew out to Tennessee, I made the decision that this was when I would ask Amanda’s parents for permission to marry their daughter. The Sunday after I got there Amanda left me at her parents' house as she went to her sorority’s weekly meeting. [Amanda: FYI - he asked me if he could stay there, and I was President at the time, so I had to run the meeting. :)] She wouldn’t be back for the next six hours [Amanda: It was elections week!], so I had plenty of time to sit down and talk with Newt and Patsy.
As the first couple hours passed by, I remember growing more and more nervous, and my heart gradually beating faster and faster. I had no idea what her parents would say. As I was sitting on the couch chatting with them and the TV was playing Sunday Night Football, I calmly said, “I would like to talk with you about Amanda.” Her parents both sat in their chairs and stared at me as her dad muted the TV and they listened attentively. My heart pounding and hands sweating, I asked for permission to marry Amanda, and both of them said yes. Her mom started to tear and gave me a hug, and both her and her dad told me I was an answer to all the prayers they had for Amanda’s future spouse since she was a child. The only thing I didn’t have was that I didn’t live in Tennessee, but they had forgotten to pray about that one, so not to worry, they said, it wasn’t my fault. I was humbled by their response and encouraging words and promised that I would love and take care of their daughter. After Amanda returned and we headed back to her apartment, I had so much excitement it was hard for me not to tell her what had just happened. Later on, I would find out that Amanda claims to have had high suspicions that I talked with her parents that night and asked for her hand in marriage. [Amanda: True. :) They all just stared at me when I walked in! I knew something had happened.]
I flew back to Connecticut and then had to decide when I would propose. Should I do it when she’s here over her Christmas break, or do I wait 'till I see her in February around Valentines and her birthday? I was so excited I couldn’t and didn’t want to wait, so I made plans to do it when she came over her break. I went to the local malls and Tiffany’s and shopped around. I called my buddy, Jon (and a couple other friends as well), about 100 times asking for advice on what I should do. Tiffany’s or mall jeweler? After much deliberation and discussion, I made the decision to go with a Tiffany ring. (Not gonna lie, until Amanda and I started talking about rings, I thought Tiffany’s was mostly just about those stained glass lamps. Let’s just say I learned a lot.)
In total, I went to 4 different Tiffany stores in 3 states [Amanda: what?!] and had the saleswoman at the last store calling and emailing around the country trying to get in a ring that fit my requirements. After all, it had to be perfect. I left the last store without a ring, waiting for the saleswoman to bring the one in that was just what I wanted. That night, on the way home I got a phone call from Amanda. I said hello, and she said she was calling me back. Back? I never called her. Strange, because according to her, she had 5 missed calls from me. I checked my phone log, and sure enough, I had called her 5 times. I freaked for a second and then calmed down. Had I dialed her when I was in Tiffany’s? Thankfully, she had been in a group meeting at school and missed my calls. If she had answered, she would have overheard everything! My Bluetooth headset in my coat pocket had turned on and dialed the last person I had talked with, which in this case happened to be Amanda. Wow, that was close.
After I got home that night, Amanda and I skyped. As we were talking, she had her phone out and said she had 4 voicemails from me. I felt my stomach jump to my throat and I checked my phone log again. Sure enough, out of the 5 phone calls I had made, 4 of them were close to or over a minute long, and one was over 4! As I wasn’t sure when the messages were left, and did not want to give away what I was doing, I told her to play them on speakerphone so I could hear them with her. I waited nervously as she dialed and strained to listen. The first message was garbled, but made me more nervous. Then the second message played and you could distinctly hear me talking with the saleswoman at Tiffany’s while we discussed rings!! What terrible luck! I quickly told Amanda to delete the message and made a little bit of a scene. [Amanda: it was so funny!!!!] Trying to come up with a reason quickly, I told her I was buying her Christmas gift (which was true, as I did get her a necklace from Tiffany’s as well) and to stop listening to the messages immediately. She laughed at me, and I didn’t know what to think. Did I give it away? What was she thinking? All I could do was smile and laugh with her. And oh well, she knew it would happen sometime anyways.
After I purchased the ring I devised a proposal plan. I decided to take Amanda out to a nice dinner in NYC and then for a carriage ride in Central Park. On the carriage ride, I would propose. When I made reservations for the carriage, they informed me that if it was below 19 degrees they would not run. No worries, I thought, after checking the temperature averages. That shouldn’t be a problem. And if it was too cold, I would just propose in Central Park without the carriage.
Now how to keep it from Amanda. We had been saying how excited we were to give each other our Christmas gifts. In a way I felt bad, since I knew when I took out the necklace in the Tiffany’s box that she might think it was a ring. But also, she had been hinting at things that made me believe she thought she was getting a ring for Christmas. [Amanda: I wasn't certain, but I felt pretty sure a ring had been purchased!] This was the perfect decoy, I thought. Not only would she get the Tiffany necklace, but it would also explain what I was doing when my phone had called her from the store. It may disappoint her that she wasn’t getting a ring, but I knew she would be getting it a few days later, and I hoped the necklace would get rid of any suspicions she had about when and how she would get it.
I told Amanda a few weeks before she came to visit that we were going to go on a nice date in NYC when she came. I looked up a few restaurants and decided on Del Frisco’s steakhouse near the Rockefeller building and Radio City. Sunday finally came - the day I would propose. A few friends had come to visit over New Years, along with Amanda, and were flying out that morning. After we dropped them off at the airport, we returned home to get ready. As luck would have it, I got a phone call from the carriage company. Trying to devise a way to call them back without Amanda hearing, I told her I was going over to the neighbors for a minute and I stepped outside to call. [Amanda: Seriously?? I wondered what you were doing!!!] To my disappointment, the carriage company informed me that it was looking like it would be too cold for the carriages to run at the time I had reserved, but that I should call back later to confirm.
We finished getting ready and headed to the train station in our bulky winter coats to head into the city. I had the ring in my jacket pocket, which I was trying not to let show. In fact, I purposely had Amanda sit to my right on the train and never hugged her from the front for fear that she would feel the little blue box.
It was brutally cold and windy in the city. We got to the restaurant with our faces frozen. As we walked through the revolving doors, we instantly saw the coat check. Oh great, I thought. Just what I didn’t want to do, leave an expensive diamond ring in my coat pocket with a stranger, but I didn’t really have a choice.
The hostess walked us upstairs and sat us, and our waiter came and asked if we had to be anywhere at a certain time. I told him we had plans at 8pm. That was going to be a total surprise and now it was a little less of one. Amanda now knew something else was in the works. As we were at the end of our meal, I told Amanda I was getting up to use the restroom. When I was out of sight, I took out my phone and called the carriage company. To my dismay, they confirmed what I was dreading - it was too cold for the carriages to run. Outside temp – 19 degrees. Bummed a little, but still excited, I walked back to the table and told Amanda the news, that I had planned to surprise her with a carriage ride in Central Park and that the weather outside wouldn’t allow for it. Nonetheless, I still wanted to go to the park. We had been planning to do this anyways, and even though it was bitter cold, I insisted we go.
As we walked ten blocks north up 6th avenue to Central Park on 59th street, I kept checking my pocket to make sure that the ring was there. Again, I made sure Amanda was walking on my right side so there was no chance she would bump into it. The wind continued to blow brutally against our faces and we had to dip inside a couple times to take a break from the cold. All the while I kept thinking, this is it, I going to propose to the girl of my dreams! [Amanda: :) :) I, on the other hand, was thinking that I wasn't getting proposed to that night, so I just wanted to go home and get out of the cold! Haha!] We crossed over 59th street and walked down the path and a stairway to The Pond and looked up at the buildings and city lights. Surprisingly, we could not see a soul as we began to walk around the water. We were alone. Just the two of us.
I had thought about how I would say it over and over in my head. I had even practiced out loud at home a few times. I had imagined everything in my head, and now it was here. As we began to walk around The Pond, I told Amanda how wild it was that we met in Vegas and were now here in NYC on the East Coast where we would start our lives together. I stopped and faced her and told her that I knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and that my heart was beating really fast. I fumbled for my zipper on my coat pocket and pulled out the ring as I got down on one knee and asked, “Amanda Kate Danley, will you marry me?” Tears began to well in her eyes as she looked down at me and said, “Of course.” I handed her the little blue box and stood up as she wrapped her arms around me and we hugged and kissed. I pulled the white ribbon off the box and she asked me to put the ring on her finger. I slid it on, a perfect fit! And not at all to my surprise but much to my joy, she went the rest of the night without a glove on her left hand in the wintery cold of NYC.
So there you have it. I would have never dreamed my life would turn out like this. I met the love of my life in Vegas, flew her to Minneapolis, visited her in Tennessee, moved to Connecticut, and proposed in NYC. Crazy! God is so good and has proven to me that he is not limited to how I perceive him. He does not live in a box and works in ways we can literally never imagine! I am so blessed and humbled to have Amanda in my life and am so excited to spend the rest of my life with her and to make her my wife!!!!!
C & A
I don't have a lot to post right now, which is why you haven't heard from me in a while. But to give you some news unrelated to the wedding - we got SNOW! And not just a little... We got like 5 inches. It's awesome! But it means that I'm stuck inside today with nothing to do and nowhere to go, haha. I was supposed to meet a couple bridesmaids at David's Bridal today to try on my top-choice dresses and so they could try on bridesmaid dresses, but we had to cancel because of the snow. Unfortunately, we are not well-equipped to handle significant amounts of snow here in middle Tennessee, so the roads are a mess.
